Dragon Cave

So I made myself a Dragon Cave account. I think I'm pretty clueless when it comes to this--is it like Magistream? I have <em>no</em> idea. But like Magistream, at least, the dragons can only grow if people click on them, but the thing is, on Dragon Cave, if the dragon doesn't have enough clicks, then it will die.

I find that rather strange.

So I have three eggs. Maybe you could click them for me, please?

http://dragcave.net/view/cbL4jsrc
http://dragcave.net/view/dDjCm
http://dragcave.net/image/04Vfx.gif
http://dragcave.net/view/X9p6R

Suck it up and breathe.

Honestly, I hate it when my family tells me to stop whining and do what I'm supposed to do.
It's as if I'm not allowed to cry. Not allowed to fight back. Not allowed to yell. Not allowed to be me.
And the thing is, when I'm angry, it's as if I can't breathe. It's just too hard. My head hurts and I try to calm myself.
Sometimes, it's easier to calm myself by not breathing.

How do you guys calm yourselves when you're angry?

Three Crushes

Yes. I do have three crushes. And I am probably dying here.

First crush: I had a crush on him for years. He's nice, and I think he has feelings for me, too. But I don't see him that much, and he's four years older than me. And he did break my heart before. And yet I still had feelings for him, though I convinced myself not.
Second crush: I'm pretty sure he had a crush on me since I was seven, while I had a crush on Person #1. xD But the thing is, only recently did I begin to like him back. My brother found out, and I thought that he did for a while now. But we don't know for sure. I don't want to ask him about it, because one wrong word can break someone's heart.
Third crush: Someone I met recently. Not much of a story here. And it's not strong feelings, so yeah. :P

If you want to know my actual horrible love story, just comment and ask! 

A bit of truth from me.

Honestly, I don't want to bring back the anger and sadness to NaNo, which is why I'm posting it here.
For all my life, at least since I started lying, I put a barrier around myself. It blocked out all the emotions around me so that I don't feel devastated. But it also worked from the inside, too. I wouldn't show any emotion except my anger, which was too hot to keep in. If I kept it in, I would burst. And I would never burst. I told myself to never, ever, burst.
So that's why people thought--think--of me as a terrible, short-tempered girl. I kept in all my other emotions. I wouldn't let anyone in, I wouldn't let myself fall.
But I had been falling the whole time.

My barrier's been breaking ever since November. I let all you Wrimos into my heart and into my life.
Did I ever stop lying?
No.
Some simple things I lied to you about, because I was so embarrassed. I lied. I lied. And lied. All those lies kept on growing together.  I didn't want people to think I was the dumbest person in the world.
I didn't want my new friends to think I was terrible.
I never wanted to lie. It just came out. I know I am terrible. But, as said in "Rise of the Guardians" by Jack Frost, I don't know my center.
Am I truly a bad person? Or am I one of those good people?
I have no idea.
And I feel as if you guys barely know me.

And recently, I knew my barrier was breaking. I knew that there would be no denying my life anymore. I knew that I had to come back to home, and my family. I was telling everyone that "I was coming back to real life."
But honestly, it's breaking me.
Not my barrier, it's breaking me. I feel like I'm dying. I'm still lying, I'm still pretending...
I don't know what's going on.
I've been lost for so long. I separated myself from my own family. And now I don't know how to come back.
I tried talking to my mom, I tried going on walks with my brother, I tried playing video games with my other brothers, I tried spending little girl time with my sister, but nothing is working.
It feels as if no one trusts me anymore.
But they have a good point to.
But every time I lie, I feel guilty. Does that mean I'm a good person?
Not if I keep on lying.

So here I am. Trying to redeem myself. I don't care.
I'm going to come back to the real world.
The internet will be a dream that I'll continue to visit.
And all my friends here can be fiction characters. Well, not real ones. Wait, that doesn't make any sense. Okay, fine, not fiction characters. Except for Lem, of course. She's always fictional.

I just hope that you guys know that I'm not giving up, so you shouldn't, either.

An Abyss (one of my poems)

Something broken.

Something undone.

Something wrong.

Something dying.

It all is so different.

I just want to run.

Run and go.

To a different place.

And not fall

In an abyss.

 

Someone loud.

Someone laughing.

Someone crying.

Someone moving.

Images swim in my head.

I think I’m going mad.

So I have to go.

To a different place.

Don’t keep me here.

In an abyss.

 

Somewhere dark.

Somewhere calling.

Somewhere lost.

Somewhere falling.

Stumbling around, crying.

It’s all an illusion, I’m told.

But they were a lie.

So I’m leaving.

To a different place.

Unknowingly

To an abyss.

Fantasies are lies.

Fantasies are realities.

Yet realities are fantasy.

And reality’s a lie.

If pushed in dark murky water,

You will drown.

Yes, drown.

In darkness.

In sadness.

In a void.

Without anyone

To be with.

Remember your past.

Live in the present.

Run to the future.

Don’t live

In an abyss.

Can we just take a moment to really appreciate something?

*coughcough*This whole thing is not by me. It is by a Wrimo, flying_cipmunk *coughcough*

Life is awesome.

Seriously guys, hear me out. I'm sure you've heard this before, and I know some of you are thinking "no it isn't, my life sucks right now!", but let me explain.

Believe me, I've had tough stuff too, but overall, life is awesome. I've seen a lot of threads about things that aren't going so smoothly lately. Or even things that going like an old Jeep headed down an unpaved mountain -- doing 60. But I urge you all, don't let that stuff get to you. Think about the awesome stuff (I'm using that word way too much. I need adjectives!). There's some of it every day. Like eating cookies or reading an amazing book or playing with a baby or listening to an epic movie soundtrack that gets your heart pumping. Or watching a new episode of your favorite TV show or dancing around he house singing Disney songs at the top of your lungs because no one's home or whatever floats your personal little boat. :)

It seems like there are a lot of amazingly encouraging people on these forums, who write some beautiful, moving things. I don't know if I measure up, but I just wanted to give everybody a little extra boost -- it seems like a lot of you are struggling, and I hurt for you!

And because I'm on a total LotR kick right now (*looks at siggy*), I'll close this off with some lovely words from Haldir:
 "The world is indeed full of peril, and in it there are many dark places; but still there is much that is fair, and though in all lands love is now mingled with grief, it grows perhaps the greater."

:D

Daydreams and Prose

Daydreams. I love them, yet despise them. Why? I love them because they are such an escape. I would love to just relax and do nothing for the whole day. And that's why I don't like them. I am trying my best to be a hardworking daughter, but it seems like one of the most impossible things to do.

The thing is, even the youngest of us all can do out best. But day dreams can distract us. And they aren't exactly the best when you're auditioning for a play, or when you're applying for a new job. They just show that you have a short attention span, perhaps boredom in the conversation, or even worse, a disinterest in the person who is talking to you.

But, in fact, that isn't happening. In your head, there's a magical creature talking to you. A piano playing. A lake shimmering. And it is so beautiful, so captivating....

Am I making you daydream now?

Poetry, prose, music, and so many other things can either bring back a memory or make you daydream. And sometimes, we truly do want those daydreams to come. Maybe because we're hurt, or we're sad, or.....

See? Prose. I love writing it, you love reading it.

I'm sorry to cut this short, but I will. Because I do think I kept you from doing something important.

Things are changing...

...I feel as if I'm growing up.

Now don't get me wrong, I did say before that I felt over-mature, but now I feel more older.

The thing is, I love NaNoLand and the internet. But I don't want to depend on it. I already depend too much on music. Today, I played outside with my friends, and I had a flashback of my entire life.

I miss it. Being that little girl who told her parents everything, being that girl who didn't fight with her brothers too much, that little girl who loved her little sister and cried when she cried. I really do.

But apparently, I have to grow up. Be a woman who I probably don't want to be now. Maybe, when I get older, I will look back at this blog, and laugh. Maybe. I doubt it.

Well, I would post more about it, but not now. :)

~Emily Z.

I'm learning about a new religion...

...for a book I'm planning to write. I don't know the title of it yet, but it's going to be about a Muslim girl. The hardest thing about this is because I'm Christian. Which means when I'm researching, I'm biting my tongue to keep myself from protesting that that what the Muslims believe, it's what they believe in, not me, and that I should respect their religion.

I mean, I do want to learn more about Islam, but it is sort of hard since I've been a Christian ever since I could remember. I really do like reading about the religion, and then I'd have loads to think over, and that's what makes it fun.

So, it would be so much easier just to say that the girl in my book was Jewish. Because, that religion is closer to mine that Islam is. But, I enjoy the challenge, and to be honest, I think that if I could set a good example of not trying to criticize a different religion other than my own, maybe the whole world could follow my example. Because, we do need respect for each other. As I said in one of my books, "Respect is one of the few things that uphold the world."

~Emily Z.

My New Idea For A Book Series!

Okay, so, I know that I have one series for Taluim. The Order of the Keepers. Now, I just had a wonderful new thought for a new series.

The Four Tribes of Taluim.

Ta-da! Magic! I know, right? It's amazing! Wind, Fire, Stone, and Water! This may be my best idea yet! And, the best part is....it's in the past. Which means I'm going to use Isla's mother, Natasha's mother, Timon's father, and Hadon't father! :DDD I can't wait to start writing!

Idea! *drums*

Aweosme, fantastic idea in my head! Yes! Best idea ever! Okay, so, you guys know how I feel as if I'm not a child anymore? Well, there should be a monthly...

BE A KID DAY!

Every 22nd of each month, I will act like a kid. No intentional wise speeches, no contradicting little kids, no being polite and calm, I will act as if I were a little kid, and I'll do the first thing that pops up in my head, not what I think is best. *nodnod*

So, today is the first Be A Kid Day! :D

The Wall Right In Front of Me

Okay, so Shimmer, one of my friends through NaNo, gave me a blogging dare.

To describe the wall in front of me. In two hundred words.

So, this wall in front of me, it's not a wall! It's a desk, you morons. The wall of a desk, or maybe a board... okay, the wood is a dark brown, maybe oak?  It feels smooth, though it's quite dusty. There are a few nails that come out and poke my hand.

I moved, once, and we took the desk with us. This wall/desk is old, very old, like sixteen years old. If we gave it away, I'd miss it. It's weird, how we miss things that are insignificant. Well, I don't know if this wall/desk is insignificant, I think that's it's kind of important.

Right now, the wall/desk is a bit warm, since the computer is heating it up. Other days, it can be really freezing cold. Also, a bunch of toys, paper, is lined up against the wall/desk. nd, for some weird reason, it smells sort of like flowers. A flower I can't name. Also, my sister is currently knocking on it, believing it's some sort of magical door that may bring her to Narnia. Which is impossible, of course. Also, the wall/desk has some scratches on it from a cat my family used to have. Done.


YAY!! I MADE IT!! HOORAH!!!! BEAT THAT, SHIMMER!!!

Okay, Shimmer, your new dare is to..... summary your favorite movie in 100 words. Only.

When I was four...

...and my dad just came home from his deployment (he used to be in the Navy and worked in the submarine), we were eating dinner. Then, my dad got a call from the sub, saying that something was broken, so he needed to help repair it. I started crying, because what normal four year old would let her father go away after about nine months of being gone? Then, my dad picked me up and started rocking me, and he sang Amazing Grace (quite horribly, if I may add). I really love that day, and it's one of my favourite memories.

I just thought I'd share that with you all.

~Emily Z.

Today I went to a church meeting.

And it was basically a party for my mom, since she's leaving on Sunday. In the middle, we had to give our wishes/thanks/ and our farewells. As always, I wasn't saying what I wanted to say. I didn't speak my heart. Instead, I said, (and this is the truth, what I said):

"It's been amazing, being around my mom for all of my life, or rather, most of my life. And, being her oldest daughter, I really love those days where she talks to me about...well, girl stuff. And, it was really good to have a handy-dandy mom around who can tell you what sickness you have, remind you to clean your room, help you decide what clothes to wear, and, even, to cut your or help cut your siblings hair. Mom, I'll miss you so much,"

Then, it was my brother's turn to say something (my youngest brother), and guess what he said?

"Mom, I'll miss you."

And the way he said it, it made all of us girls think of Elvis, so we were doing imitations, and were laughing until it was my mom's turn to speak,

"As a mother, my first priority is to take care of my children. When my children were younger, and I went overseas, Jerry (my dad), would send me a letter, saying what they were doing, who got sick, and who is having problems. And, of course, it makes me want to be there, with my chilren, but I'm right here, hundreds of miles away. I just want to keep my children safe..."

She said more, but I'm crying right now so please don't ask me to finish that. Nine months. *sniff* But then everyone started hugging her, and then one of the preachers (we're a funny, small, weird, church, just saying. XP), joked that the way to make sure her kids were safe was to let the families of the church take care of them. So then, people started saying that they called Sarah, my little, cute, adorable sister, and my brothers' friends said that their parents would adopt them, and no one actually offered to "adopt" me until the pastor said, "If any of you want cookies daily, then call Emily!"

So, I was laughing so hard, especially when Nathan (my youngest brother) told me that he wasn't really listening, so why was everyone wiping tears out of their eyes while laughing at the same time?

~Emily Z., Emily Music, Emily_Dancing, EmmyZee, the girl who is crying in her heart, but laughing at the same time.

TAG!!! YOU ARE SO IT!!

Okay, I've been tagged. *taunts* But don't worry! I won't tag you unless you have a blog! So, Bean/Topaz tagged me, so let's have some fun! :D

So, rules and somewhat boring stuff.

1. If you are tagged, answer the questions in the meme in a blog post on your blog.
2. Make sure at the beginning of your post you put a link to the blog of the person who tagged you.
3. Tag at least three people to do the same thing (you can tag more than three people if you would like).
4. Have fun!

Questions
What do you think the weirdest color is? Dark brown. It's so close to black, that it actually tricks people into thinking that it is black! (it's also the colors of my eyes)
What is the weirdest TV show/movie you have ever seen? Hmm....I think I would say Pokemon, since it just keeps on continuing, and it's getting a bit boring, and Ash isn't ten years old anymore!
What is the weirdest food you have ever tried? Puto. It looks like this, and my mom makes it a lot, and it tastes awesome!
What is the weirdest drink you have ever tried? Diet Coke. It tastes so weird! It has that abnormal taste, but it doesn't have any of that soda fizzle.
Who is your weirdest friend? Oh! That is the hardest one of all....you see, my brothers, their friends, and I have this youtube account called KrazyKompany, so you can see why it's so hard! I think it's Beaux (prounouced as BO)/Kirbyrai, and he's really crazy, but awesome!
What is the weirdest thing you have ever seen on the internet? NaNoWriMo
What is the weirdest thing your pet has ever done? Well, one time, my dog, Zeus, when he was a puppy, he once thought that another small, brown, dog was a squirrel, so he chased after it all over the neighborhood.
What is the weirdest book you have ever read? Um...it matters.....
What is the weirdest blog you follow? I only follow....hm.....I don't think I follow any! -_-

Oh...need to do the second part, now! *scramble off to find the three people she knows with blogs*

People I tagged:
Sock
Jada
Cris

Eragon

So, I just re-watched the movie for the second time. Again, I want to hit the TV set and scream at the movie producters because they made it so horrible. What? Me? Hit/kick/punch a TV? Never.

So, I made myself read the book for the eight-millionth time. I. Was. So. Happy. And. Amazed. And. Sad. And. OMG. WHY. IS. THE. MOVIE. SO. HORRIBLE???? I just love the books, ever since I started reading them in November and finished them in early December.

But when I watched the movie, I wished they made completely different one. Here are my reasons:

1. Eragon. So. Not. What. I. Pictured.
2. Really? Saphira has spikes on her back, not just smooth scales!
3. Brom did not set fire on Gareth, Roran's father. The Ra'zaac did it.
4. I truly thought that Murtaugh was older.
5. Arya has black hair, not brown-ish-blond, for goodness' sake!
6. Where in the world are the Letherblarka?
7. Roran looks way too much like Eragon.
8. There is no Kratina!!!
9. The plot isn't right. Not at all!
10. Because the movie made me rant on and on, I felt like making a tenth reason.

So, that's all for now! (at least about Eragon)

~Emily Z.

Guys, I think that I...

...actually have a serious condition. My face is too pale, it almost looks white (I look Asian, as you can see if you look at my profile), my dark brown eyes look black, and I have huge lines of black under my eyes.

I lost almost all appetite, yet, whenever I start eating, I eat so much. Like last night, I ate a whole bag of bread. At once.

And now I have sore throat, but my mom wants to make sure it's not strep throat since I can barely talk. She said she's taking me to the doctor, but I think she's been trying to think of an excuse to bring me there ever since I stoped showing up at meals.

So if my mom noticed, then who else? Who else noticed my papery skin? My lack of speech?

Last night, I only had five hours of sleep. Horrible, five, hours. I don't feel like moving at all, anymore.

Am I having a serious health problem?

Sometimes, people ask me...

..."Why do you dance?"

Such. A. Simple. Question.

But it has a complicated answer.

My belief is, is that dancing is a form of expressing yourself. If you're sad, you can dance lyrical. If you're energetic, you can dance hip hop or jazz. If you feel noisy, then tap it is. If you feel like flowing to the music, then get your ballet slippers.

Did you ever watch a ballerina onstage? It's amazing. Or even a jazz dancer, tap dancer, hip hop dancer, ballroom dancer, lyrical/contemporary dancing, it's all fantastic. You can never get tired of watching the same dancer over and over again if she/he truly loves his/her job.

So, the next time you hear that a dance show is going on, go to it. Try to find the people who actually love dancing.

Maybe, just maybe, I'll be there, too.

~Emily Z.

Does anybody ever even....

....read these blog posts? I mean, they're just like a diary, right? So, it must mean it's boring. I'm so sorry to be wasting your time. The title should be called, "The boring ramblings of a hurt ten year old girl who dances but is clumsy and who writes but only for ten minutes a day".

Also, I draw. *nodnod* I wish I could show ya'll my drawings.....it would be fun. I draw manga, and I even try my hand at realistic (definitely not showing you that). Anyways, carry on!

Sometimes, I feel as if I'm....

....alone. Completely alone. With no one to care for me. Maybe it's because I'm unable to tell my parents what I think.

It's weird, I can post almost about anything online, but I'm too scared to have this conversation:

"Hey, Dad, can I tell you something?"

"Hm. Go on, Emily."

"Well, you see, I'm having trouble in school."

"I noticed that, Emily."

"And I have sleeping problems."

"Because you read at night."

"I read at night because there's nothing else to do. Anyways, I also have a lack of appetite."

"Then eat."

"But--but--don't you think there's something wrong?"

"Emily, you're just not taking care of yourself. Don't worry, in one week everything will be okay."

You know what? My dad wouldn't even be listening by the end of the second sentence. If I told my mom this, she would over-react and bring me to the hospital.

But I always blend into the background. Sure, I'm tall and have thick midnight black hair. So, in some ways, I stand out. But I'm quiet, I hesitate, I'm nervous, it makes people overlook me.

Don't worry, everyone, I won't commit suicide. I just feel...insignificant.

Any advice? Please?

Starting this Janurary........

....my mom will be deployed to Gitmo, Cuba. :( For nine months! I'll miss her so much. But that's not the worst part.

When she comes back in November, we'll supposedly be ready to move in December, move to Guam. I lived all my ten lives in Virginia Beach, and NO WAY do I want to move to Guam!

First of all, all my friends. My best friend doesn't have an email account, not even a NaNoWriMo account! How will I communicate with her?? And all my other best friends! My church! *faints*

So, this will be one of the biggest changes of my life. I'll be moving to Guam, a thirty-two mile island that you can drive around in two hours, and Guam is also smack in the middle of Typhoon Aisle. *facepalm*

And we'll stay there for three years. In a small house. Me and my family of seven.

Small house+three brothers+two girls+busy mom and dad=very bad situation.

But, somehow, I will survive.

May your swords stay sharp. ♥

Today was horrible....

In dance class, my teacher started teaching us our recital dance. She was seeing who could do the straddle splits, do a jazz square, things like that. Oh, and we also had to do spin leaps (which is doing a grand jete, except you have to spin around every time you land then jump out again).

I had lots of fun, I mean, if you were doing something you love to do, then how can you not have fun? But the thing is, I was nervous that I would do something wrong, and I wasn't trying my very best. 

So, at the end of class, Ms. Medina, my teacher, told us all that she was auditioning us. Not for anything special, it's just to see who will be dancing in front of the stage for the recital and who will just be posing in the background. She said only three of us passed.

I was definitely not one of the three.

But Ms. Medina said that she would give us one more shot, next week. So, for the whole of this week, I'll be dancing and memorizing everything I can.

But I'm angry at myself, for not trying my best. Like when Ms. Medina asked us who could do the straddle splits, I could've said that I almost could do it, and I would be able to do it by next week. But I didn't step up. I hanged back. But from now on, I will do my best, all the time.


Wish me luck! :)

~Emily Z.

Beware of the Zeddy

Another nano-er, zeddy, is planning to rule the world. Oh, I just thought I'd give you a warning. You know, a friendly warning. This isn't one of those "Go and run for your life!" warnings. It definitely isn't.

So, beware.

Dance Class....

...it always comes at the wrong time! Other days, I just want to go and dance and learn. But, always, every Tuesday and Wednesday, the days of my dance classes, I don't want to go! I feel like staying in bed, or reading a book, things like that. Life seems so cruel. Right now, I need to find my leotard and my dance bag, then I'll be running off, trying not to embarass myself because I'm not the best dancer.

Well, I'm flexable. I can spread my legs out and touch my forehead to the floor, and hold that position for ten minutes (I timed myself, before). But dancing, itself, not improvising, is hard for me to do. Maybe it's because I'm so freakishly tall for a ten year old, that I'm clumsy. But I doubt it.

Anyways, I need to head off for dance class, and, as always, I'm procrastinating.

~Emily Z.

Novel Summaries

I'm going to post some or all of my novel summaries. Please do not use these ideas.


Time of Grace
An only child daughter, Grace, takes whatever she wants, doesn't care for anyone who is "below" her, and she cares only about her looks. But when one day, she finds that she's unable to look in a mirror, unable to wear make-up, unable to do anything that could possibly make herself look better and impress other people. She finds a note on her desk, saying that she has to learn how to be kind, graceful, and sharing. Confused, Grace sets off on what may be the most amazing month of her life.



Rising High; A Girl Who Fell
Can friendship last through struggles? Elizabeth Masen finds herself in a tough spot after she made it into the Star Control dance competition with her best friend, Alice Chenney. When Alice says the wrong things and Eliza doesn't trust Alice any more, neither of them know what to do. Sadly, when fate leads them to the finals, they have to make a choice that will either make the both of them suffer, or will teach them both a life lesson.
A story of friendship, Rising High, a novel of a girl who fell.


Alleyway
Bella was kidnapped when she was a young girl. Growing up with bandits, she meets another boy, Jack, and they become friends. But when she gets caught by the police, who believe that she's a suspect of a murder, she goes into court. No one realizes that she's the missing girl from ten years ago. Will she find her way out of this mess?

Molly of Two Worlds
Six-year-old Molly is spoiled. So ridiculously spoiled. But one day, she finds herself as a cat. Kicked out of her home, she wanders the streets, finds a pack of rabid dogs, but is saved by Jared, an adult cat who teaches Molly the basics of being a cat. Later on, Molly is found by a man, her own father, and put into the animal shelter. Will she going to be adopted, to be a cat for the rest of her life, or will she somehow become human again?

Strictly Dancing; A Girl of Her Father (sequel to Rising High)
When Madeline was young, her father wanted her to take dance lessons. Madeline liked ballet, but she liked soccer much better. But when her father wants Madeline to take dancing up as a career, Madeline needs to make a desicion that will either hurt her father, or will make her dreams come true.
A story of the relationship between a father and his daughter, Strictly Dancing, a novel of a girl with her father.

Forever Rising; A Girl Who Won't Give Up (the third book of the Star Dancing trilogy)
Alice Chenney, a winner of the Star Control dance competition, gets a phone call from a rich man in Europe, asking if she could teach his young daughter how to dance. So Alice goes to Europe, where she teaches Molly Lestina ballet. Soon, when her mother becomes sick, she';s told to go back to America. But Molly has become a sister to Alice. Alice doesn't know whether or not if she wants to go back to America. What will be her final decision?
Astory of learning how to adapt, Forever Rising, a novel of a girl who won't give up.

A Girl of Her Dreams; A Story of a Writer
Emily Zeigler never believed in the terms "normal" and "average". Maybe it was because she never was normal or average. Smart, tall, dance-loving, over-mature, she never belonged to a group. But she loved writing, and that's how she found out about National Novel Writing Month, and that's how her life truly began... 

Aren't these ideas amazing? :P

Some things aren't as they seem....

....some things are weird. They just go crazy. And, for some reason, we feel the need to blabber on about our lives. That's what I'm doing now, so go if you don't want to listen.

So many people in real life, and NaNo, too, come up to me, thinking that I'm smart, I'm cute, I look tired, I'm popular, I'm tall, I'm cheeful, I sing good, I like dancing......etc. But, it's so weird, because not many know that they're talking to a ten year old.

Really, no kidding, I'm just ten. If you saw me post on other forums, and you see how mature I am, it seems impossible. Well, to be honest, things don't always look as they seem. Even in real life, people mistook me for being twelve, thirteen, even fourteen sometimes!

I feel as if my childhood as been thrown away. I felt like this ever since I was six. I feel too mature. I feel too grown up. Especially with my mom going to Cuba, and everyone is saying that I'm going to be "the woman of the house". They say that I am smart, and will find a way to get through this mess.

Do they forget that they're talking to a ten year old? That they would never say that to any other average girl? Is it because of my height? Is it because of the bags around my eyes that give the impression, no, that shows that I am truly tired? Is it because I never betray any emotion that flies around wildly in my head? Is it because...

Is it because I am truly mature, and popular?

It's weird. For all of my life, I had hid in a corner, afraid to go out, afraid to look out. I dreamed in
that little corner, dreamed of possiblities, truth, and life. But, in the November of 2012, I took one step out of that corner. I was ready to show the world that I mattered. That I wasn't just another brick in the wall. Day by day, my family, my church, my friends, my neighbors, they all noticed the difference. How I laughed easily, that deep look in my eyes, I seemed....alert.

I don't feel that way, anymore. With less than a week with my mom leaving, and knowing that 2013 will be the start of a change in my life, my dreams, I want to go back to that corner. I want to hide. But I can't go back, that would be useless. Anyways, it's impossible. To go back. To. Sit. And. Wait. My. Life. Out.

I know what I want to do now. I want to be that girl, that woman, that girls look up to as a role model. People could search my name, and a biography of myself would be the first answer. I don't want to leave the world, not making a mark, a stand.

Great. I probably wasted about five minutes of your time. To be honest, I was planning to say something else in this thread. But I didn't, so I had to change part of the beginning. :P Anyways...thank you for listening. And I'm enormously glad that I don't know you in real life. Oh, and everything I said was true, and I didn't change anything from what I originally typed.

~Emily Z.

Third Person

Emily wants to know if anybody ever wrote in third person. It's really easy, and sometimes fun. What? The people reading this don't like third person? Emily gasps, she's so shocked.

Emily continues, "When talking in third person, remember not to 'I' or 'you' unless a character in talking. Also, people have preferences. Like, some people like present tense first person, while other like past tense third person. I like past tense, but sometimes present tense is better."

"Third person is fun to do. Especially if you do it with yourself. It's like imagining your expressions with your mind's eye. Try it out sometime."

Emily leaves, closing the door quietly.

Helping a friend.....

Hey everybody! One of my friends on NaNo, she asked me if I could help her with her stories. They are on TeenInk, and she would love it if you read it and tell her what you think. Here are the links:

http://www.teenink.com/fiction/romance/article/517158/M
http://teenink.com/fiction/realistic_fiction/article/517157/Silver-Lining-in-a-Dark-Cloud/
http://teenink.com/fiction/realistic_fiction/article/517178/Catty-Relationships/

Thank you for your help!

The Writer

You're probably wondering why I am "The Writer of Taluim".

Ahem, Taluim is a planet I made up for one of my book series. It's not finished yet, and it probably won't be finished until a long time from now. But I'm writing different stories. Here's a list:

• Rising High
• Time of Grace
• Molly of Two Worlds
• Strictly Dancing
• The Beast of Roth

If you want any information about the books, then please tell me?! Also, if any of you happen to have a ywp.nanowrimo account, then click here!

Writing is really fun, and I love participating in National Novel Writing Month (nanowrimo for short). I also won nanowrimo, which was probably one of the biggest achievements of my life.

First Blog!

Hello, all, my name is Emily, as you can see. First of all, I want to say, I'm ten years old, I love writing and dancing.

Yes, right now, you're thinking "This girl must be so weird." or "Dancing? Writing? So immature."

But the fact is, I'm smart. I'm tall. I have friends who are grown-ups. I probably know more than you, dear reader.

Yes, this is a horrible introduction. But life is full of surprises, no? And life is also full of mysteries. And trouble. So that's probably why I made this blog, so then I could say all my troubles, mysteries, and laughs, and someone, someone who I won't ever see in real life, can read it, and think that I'm amazing.

Though, I doubt that you'd think that.

That's all for now, or, maybe not just now. Maybe I'll come back sooner than you think.



~Emily Z.